FAMILY

An elderly lady went to a different dentist and whilst she was in the waiting room she noticed his diploma on the wall and remembered the name from school. When she went into the dentists room she saw that he was a very old man and thought that he couldn't be her school friend who she had had a crush on. However she asked him and he smiled and said; " Yes that's me." Then he looked at her closely and said; "What did you teach?". Life can be so cruel and the steady road from youth to old age and memory loss and possible dementia and alzheimers stretches out before us. Fortunately the young are immortal and they are not going down that inevitable road! The reality is of course that memory loss will come to almost everyone and dementia to quite a few and alzheimers to 75% of those who get dementia. My own poor memory has been getting worse for years and the visit to the doctor when I was told the fatal news was only to find out what I could take to improve memory.The prescription for Omega 3 was a possible way of delaying the process but not much more. For me it was a shocking blow to be given the bad news about dementia and I have to say that I felt ashamed and that I would keep it a secret like so many HIV people do. However, on reflection I decided t come out of the closet. There were two reasons for this. The first was the need to express my feelings. The second was to share my problem with others and perhaps my own experiences as I deteriorated might help other families deal with this dreadful global problem. What quickly struck me was that the problem was my family's problem as much as my own. At the moment they understand that Uncle David has a bad memory, but as time goes on the logistical problems of fading memory and fading ability to solve simple problems will effect them all. My research shows that caregivers should focus on optimizing the patients health. This is not just a question of good eating but also encouraging exercise as well. The quality of life will make a big difference to a sufferer of memory loss, dementia, or alzheimers.Neglected patients who are not stimulated deteriorate faster. This brings me to an important point. It is almost impossible for one person to look after a patient on their own. A family support group to not only help with chores but also to give the principal carer a break is essential. Looking after a patient with advanced dementia or alzheimers is very gruelling. The main carer must have a break away for a couple of days a month. Thus others in the family need to learn competency and must be encouraged to give love as well. If there are no others in the family willing or able to look after the victim one should approach the church. There are many good people who are aware of their own blessings and willing to put something back. My own dementia is like a cloud creeping a little closer every day. However, I have a long way to go yet and I am determined to finish my new book; 'Down and Out In Bolandville.' Work continues on this and I am sure will help me to hold things together for a little longer. The weather is cooler here today and Boysie will be disappointed that at 27% it is too cold for me to swim with him. Bobby the parrot has learnt another word and is calming down a little. The squirells are making themselves at home eating all the avocados, but we don't mind too much. Keep taking the tablets. David Barnato. Paarl. South Africa