DEMENTIA AND FUN ----- STEAK AND SPIDERS

Boredom is a big challenge for anyone who is ill and dementia patients at all stages need the stimulation of different activities. In the early stages of dementia when reading is still possible and watching television an option it is not difficult to keep a patient occupied. However, passive activities are not enough and if possible swimming, walking and dancing should be encouraged. If however dementia advances and even watching television becomes difficult then the patient will probably enjoy music, perhaps especially the music of their youth and caregivers should try and ascertain the patient's choice in that direction.
Socialising with friends and family should always be possible, even if at a later stage it means this taking place at the patient's home. With friends and family it will be easy to explain that any odd behaviour will be the disease and not the patient. The more knowledge that everyone has of dementia itself and even Alzheimer's in case that is what the dementia evolves into, the better.
The reactions of others to both dementia and Alzheimer's will separate the real friends from the false. Many people sadly act as if Alzheimer's is catching. Be prepared for this and be patient with people, as everyone has their challenges.Visiting restaurants can be a special challenge, as sometimes word loss and confusion takes place and a lot of imagination and ingenuity may be necessary to understand what the patient wants and to translate this for the benefit of the waiter. In a book that I was reading recently a lady's elderly father asked for a steak and spiders. Fortunately she had the wit to realise that spiders meant chips!
At all stages patients love to be taken out and even a trip to McDonalds can be an adventure and picnics a real treat and although being responsible for a patient is a big challenge many activities will also benefit the caregiver.
Everyone needs fun. Caregivers perhaps more than most, because of the enormous challenges of their responsibility, so steps must be taken to enable caregivers to have breaks. Perhaps this will involve new faces being introduced to take over sometimes and many patients will find this worrying and confusing. The answer is to plan ahead and have a future caregiver visit and spend some time with both caregiver and patient to enable acceptance to take place. It is possible that the patient will worry if the caregiver leaves the room, so initially a brief explanation will be necessary to put the patient at ease; "I'm just going to put the kettle on.". Or "I'm just going to hang the washing out". Etc. It may take a visit or two before the patient will accept the caregiver leaving the house and the initial absences should be short and perhaps a bribe offered, such as; " I'm going to bring you back a bar of chocolate." Et.c.
All of this takes time and effort and it is why that I personally think that the job of a dementia caregiver is the hardest job on the planet.
My own dementia remains static, although I did have one blank spot when I had no memory of carrying out a small task. It is extraordinary how upsetting this is, one feels as if you are living on a knife edge and balancing mind and body to remain sane. However, past damage can't be repaired, so these kind of incidents will always happen from time to time.
Coping with dementia requires calmness and patience I find. One goes through a period of almost rage, but it must pass, not only for one's sanity, but also to help in the fight against 'The Enemy.'
Weather here in Paarl remains very pleasant. I am currently working in my 'Wendy house' in the garden with the door open, so the temperature is not yet that cold. The three dogs each have a bed in here and they snooze when I work in the mornings. At night they have their other beds inside the house.
Bobby the parrot is very vocal today, I am not quite sure if he is greeting other wild birds or swearing at them.
Keep taking the tablets.
David Barnato.
barnatod@blogspot.com